Microscopes, Horoscopes, and All The Rest
Pisces (2/19 – 3/20): Go watch this documentary, Pisces. (Or, listen to the podcast.) It's about a guy who, after a head injury, creates a whole miniature WWII town in his backyard, and makes complicated stories out of barbies and his alter-ego doll. It's like Lars and the Real Girl, but sadder, sweeter, more heartbreaking. At first I was amused because it seems a bit crazy drag barbies around in a toy jeep to scuff up the tires. But by the end, I felt different, maybe a bit teary. It was so poignant -- a man creating friends and an engaged life out of plastic barbies to alleviate his loneliness. I think we all do that a little bit, don't we?Aries (3/21 - 4/19): I've been feeling the need to make miniature fire pits that I can carry with me and give away. I'm not sure why but I'm fairly obsessed with it at the moment.
Taurus (4/20 – 5/20): What if you got dolphins, instead of endorphins from exercise. Right? Now that, my friends, would eliminate obesity. Spinning with the dolphins? Isn't that what we all want, from the very deepest soul of our being? Do you think the tv show "Flipper" changed us all? How about Mr. Ed? I have kind of a giant crush on Mr. Ed, truth be told.
Gemini (5/21 - 6/21): There are people who act as reference points in our lives -- the ones we consider before we act, the ones we want to tell stuff to, the ones who's opinions we care about. In short, the people who matter. Love those people well, even if you never see them, they die, they disappear from view or your life.
Cancer (6/22 – 7/21): Here's an ethics question, Cancer. If you are tasked with babysitting someone's sourdough starter, and it's been in their family for generations. Like, maybe it was on the Mayflower, or in the goldrush, and under your jurisdiction it dies. Maybe it's not your fault. The starter could have just been in a down phase, like, "what's the point?" Or maybe there was some malpractice; it's a bit unclear. Anyway, the question, Cancer, is: should you go get more starter somewhere and say nothing, the way people do when they pet sit a turtle that dies? Or, do you fess up?
Leo (7/23 – 8/22): I listened to a podcast created by a home organizer in Cincinnati, and my immediate thought was "thank god that's not my life." House organizer, Cincinnati -- the whole thing sounds dismal and makes my life seem pretty damn good because at least it's near mountains and the ocean.
Virgo (8/23 – 9/22): I saw this cool underground yellow jacket nest yesterday. I don't know if it's as amazing on a tiny video, but somehow, there was a big hole in a lawn, and the wasps moved in. So many questions! Why underground in a wetland, yellow jackets? Wouldn't you rather be in a tree? Virgo, don't go underground, whatever you do. Stay up here with us!
Libra (9/23 – 10/22): I had a chance to do an invertebrate identification class last week, and it was so fun that I've been longing for a microscope and a light trap. I just want to study something, anything. I'm not sure what it is, but I think its an urgency about how quickly the climate and the planet is changing, and I want to document something right now. It might be useful.
Scorpio (10/23 – 11/21): Speaking of podcasts that you should listen to, do it! Ok, but here's the other thing I want to talk to you about, Scorp. Anyway, when I get rich, which isn't very likely given that I don't work very hard, there will be a round of microscopes for all my loved ones.
Sagittarius (11/22 – 12/21): I listened to a podcast created by a home organizer in Cincinnati, and my immediate thought was thank god that's not my life. House organizer, Cincinnati -- the whole thing sounds dismal and makes my life seem pretty damn good because at least it's near mountains and the ocean. But she's so encouraging, and she doesn't seem to judge. Just take it one step at a time, she says. She has no idea what we're dealing with, though.
Capricorn (12/22 - 1/19): I keep thinking about her, my encouraging, tidy, Cincinnati guide. I looked up Cincinatti on Google Earth, and wonder which side of the Ohio River she lives on. Probably the north, because it looks like that's where the people mostly live. Is it flat? How often does the river flood? Do they have good wetland regulations there? (Um, it doesn't look like they have any. Gulp.) And so on. And this, my friends, is why she's a home organizer and I'm not. I spend my time on random stuff and she has a plan and sticks to it. Here's the thing, Cap: I found myself buffing my flat stovetop range with a product that I acquired in 2003, and suddenly felt so vacant and unimportant doing that task that I almost stuck my head right in the oven, the way Sylvia did. Alas, it's electric, so no worries.
Aquarius (1/20 – 2/18): But she told me one thing in Step 1 of house organizing, and I did that and it lasted for a second. Step 1 is to put all the loose papers into a basket. Every single paper. I did that, and then more papers came, and then I misplaced the box for a few days.
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