Showing posts from February, 2014

We're still at war, right? With unknown terrorists?

I believe this is my favorite movie.

Manly horoscopes

Aries (3/21 – 4/19):  FB is 10 years old now, which make all of those Farmville animals middle-aged.  (How long did Dolly live, anyway?  Oh wait, I'm on the internets!  I could look it up!  Of course I will.)  Although I'm so lacking in material, I will not tell you what I had for dinner, although it was delicious.  No one gives a rats ass what anyone else had for dinner.  

(I'm sorry about the weird font issue here. So sorry, indeed.)

Taurus (4/20 – 5/20):  I'm having this relationship with my bed that may or may not be affecting other actual relationships with the living humans.  But it's mutual and comfortable.  (Well, it was comfortable, until I started sleeping with a rock, but that's another matter.  An actual rock, in case you're wondering)  Your horoscope, Taurus, is this:  if you're going to sleep with a rock, put it in the microwave for at least three minutes first.  That seems like a long time, and it may also seem like unhoroscopish witch do…

Short days

Time is so short these days that I can't create even the lamest post.

Here's the breakdown of how I spend my days.

That tiny light blue segment at the top?  What's supposed to go in there, my friends, is all of this:

Make money, pay bills, do dishes, have friends.  Behave like a person.  Although there's some question about that.* Do all the other important stuff, like draw bugs, make ghee candles, track bloomtimes, learn about pivot tables, read, write, try to empathize with all of the suffering humans.  Shop for a new pillow.Go outside.Anyway, I keep thinking I'd like to write horoscopes, but in addition to the lack of time to write, there's the problem of being awake long enough for something to happen, and collecting 12 things. Twelve recent things that aren't all dreams and route talk, and then writing about them.
*I got this from 23 & Me:  "Betsy, our laboratory attempted to isolate DNA from your saliva sample. Unfortunately, the sample did not y…

Stoner bowl

There's a giant hoopla going on around here, something about football.  People I know and love are inexplicably excited about it, so I've done a little research myself.  If you, like me, are fairly unfamiliar with the whole thing, here's a primer.

There are 11 guys from Seattle, and 11 guys from Denver who really want the ball to be at their end of the field.  There's only one ball, though, called a pigskin.  It's not really made of bacon.  Their end of the field is in New Jersey.  Both of their ends are in NJ, but we'll get to that.

If I were the parent of these guys, I'd say, "Hmm, could you boys work something out using your words?  Maybe the fellows in the blue shirts can have a turn with the ball at their end for a while, and then the other guys can have it?  Here's an idea:  you could do rock paper scissors to see who gets the first turn!  Or maybe you could have a lemonade stand, and work together to earn some money to buy a second pigskin …