Friend's Birthday

Dear Qourt-knee,

A friend of ours has a milestone birthday coming up - 50 - and as far as we can tell she has no big plans. We want to celebrate it with her, but we're not sure how. Do you think a surprise party would be appropriate? We're not really sure how into surprises she is, and we don't know all the people she might want to be at such a party. What's your advice? Should we plan something big behind her back? Something small in front of her front? Or just let her come up with her own plans, even if that is just spending her big day at home with whatever cats she may or may not have?

- Party boy

Dear Party Boy,

The strangest thing is, I actually know a cat named Friend.  I know! 

But anyway, she's certainly lucky to have friends like you guys, and I'm sure if she's worth it, she'll be delighted to celebrate with you in any way, large or small, especially if it involves cake.  She's old enough that she's probably just feeling grateful to get another trip around in good health, accompanied by the fine friends and relations she's lucky enough to have, and isn't feeling too particular about what happens on that actual day. 

And since you wrote, and I'm in that rare state that we call "awake", I'll tell you this:  On a recent trip, as I went through airport security, a security guy selected my carry-on bag for extra screening.  I was still putting my shoes on and stuff so I couldn't really see the whole thing, but the young people I was with said he just put a piece of litmus paper or something in the luggage.  Could that be true?  Then looked at me and said, "Hey, if you're ever back here, give a holler to a player."  But it sounded more like, "... give a hollah to a playah".   And then he made a mark with a pen on his latex glove.  My question for you, Party Boy, is what does it all mean?


  1. Dear Corhtneee,

    Do you think Party Boy's friend might enjoy spending her birthday at the Olympus Spa with a couple of her close female friends? That seems like a fine way for a woman to spend her 50th, yes?

    --Spa Girl

  2. If I were you I'd check that "litmus paper or something" for a phone number. I'm not sure you can handle the truth, however, about that latex glove.

  3. Dear Spa Girl,
    I'm sure Party Boy's friend would be totally game for a spa day, maybe when it gets darker and rainier. That's just my guess, though, about Party Boy's friend. And David, I am pretty sure you're right, about not being able to handle the truth. One of the young people thought that the marks on the glove indicated how many times he'd used that cheesy line with a straight face.

  4. I'd recommend 10-layer chocolate cake to Party Boy


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