N'3lvra (pronounced Kort-knee, the 3 is silent) got a letter!!

Dear Khortney,
 I was considering the qwerty keyboard layout and various failed attempts to remove it as the standard. I thought that an interesting idea would be to change alphabetical order to match the keyboard. I think the first step is to come up with an alphabet song in the qwerty order. Do you think this is a development that would aid our society, and will you use your celebrity to aid my cause.

Signed,

Pablo Magnifico

Dear Pablo,

That's brilliant.  Changing alphabetical order will lead to exciting, sensational, astonishing, unaparalleled opportunities for woman and mankind alike.  (Hey, guess what?  Someone gave me a list of 186 power words.  It's going to launch me into being monumental and successful, just like your idea.)

But back to you, Pablo.  It will be as easy as qwe, the letters formerly known as abc.  I'd recommend that we sing to the tune of "doe, a deer."  "Queue, a line I wait within, W a third of the world wide web, E, a sound, I make myself when I see a little mouse running across the floor [which I just did, but that's not part of the real song]..." and so on.  I will hurl myself and my collosal celebrity at this timely, gigantic opportunity with wonderful delighted energy.  (All of this, and I still have abundant, urgent, professional words left, absolutely free, on the list which is crammed with urgent stuff that may unlock fortunes!)  At any rate, I plan to use the secret power of this list in authentic partnership with my vast celebrity to unlock the power of your idea.

Hey, speaking of ideas, I was thinking of starting yet another religion.  It will involve gravity, which is here for you in your time of need, and will absolutely make your life better if you believe in it (not unlike qwerty), but if not, you'll probably float away.  Because gravity requires that we believe, with all our hearts.  What do you think?

Yours,
Khort-qneee

PS  It is sensational to get a letter, after all these years.

Comments

  1. I've often thought that due to certain geologic facts, the Pacific NW is ideally suited to form a religion involving volcano sacrifices. Not sure if you could work that into a gravity based religion, but wanted to put that out there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I do believe Khort-qneee/Kort-knee/N'3lvra is having an identity crisis :)

    ReplyDelete

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