If the skirt fits
Text conversation with R. in the middle of the day today:
R: During passing period, I asked Ms X [student teacher] if she was wearing a skirt or a kilt, and she took 5 points off my participation grade.
Me: Oh, R. Next time, could you just assume it's a skirt? [I say this because I know how important it is to him that we use language precisely. He's not just being a smart ass, language really does matter to him.]
R: Easier said than done, Mom. The item is plaid.