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Showing posts from July, 2013

Dead Letters

I've been having this problem with my PO box which is that I never get any mail.  I assumed it was the ordinary version of that problem (no one mails me  anything), but then someone contacted me, asking if I'd received a check he mailed a check 10 days ago.  
There's only one problem you can have with a post office box.  If you have a car, you might have windshield wipers that don't work, or a weird rattle at a certain speed.  Or even a phone, which might be a little better metaphor, could have various problems.  But there's only one thing that can go wrong with a PO box.
And, if you have that problem, you can either have to just suck it up and just go to the post office every day to read the obituaries on the window, knowing you won't get mail, or you can tangle with the weird bureaucracy that is the federal government.  Neither option looks good.
I decided to test the system by mailing something to myself.  I rummaged around in my car and found an envelope and …

Horoscopes: The Skull Edition

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Aries (3/21 – 4/19):Here's something fascinating, Aries:  this post.  Don't you want to do the DNA testing now?  I bet I can find a groupon.  In fact, someone told me he could hook me up with a groupon, because his son, the product of a sperm donor, used one for DNA testing.  When someone tells you that, do you get to ask questions?  NO!  Aries, NO.  That's how someone ends up learning way too much, being a human listening post.  (What is a listening post anyway?)  See, I'm only on the first one and I'm already headed off to google something.  I'm thinking of a genome party, where we all spit in a vial, mail the kits back, and reconvene for the results, presuming they aren't too sad.  In or out?  Aries, if you do DNA testing, I promise to create a chart or graph of some sort with the data.  It's going to be a good week for you.  I can just tell.

Taurus (4/20 – 5/20):  A while back, maybe in February, there was a bad smell in my
barn, the smell of somethi…

bones and the universe

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Aries (3/21 – 4/19):  I started volunteering at a museum cleaning newly excavated Triceratops bones, which is a crazy mix between tedious and awesome.  After a few hours of carefully scraping rock off the bone under a microscope, during which I cleaned about one square centimeter, the man teaching me said, "You get it, right?  This is painstaking tedious work with no pay off.  Are you in?"  Of course I'm in.  Duh.  Because the payoff, Aries, is shiny bones!  Keep your bones shiny this week.  Suit up.  It's going to be a long one.

Taurus (4/20 – 5/20):  Our town has a FaceBook page where people post things of local interest.
 I read a post yesterday about a guy on the trail who approached a car in the round-about and knocked on the window, while holding what we call his "universe".  After a few concerned comments, someone posted, "Oh, I know him.  He's harmless.  He just lost his phone and was agitated, but the phone has been found."  Taurus, …